Forgiveness is for...

I've often heard it said that if I forgive someone, it's for my sake that I do so. I'll feel good and I'll have peace.
Actually, I find forgiveness quite painful, especially when there is no change in the other person's behaviour and attitude. Bitterness comes so much more easily and feels right. The person does not deserve to be let off the hook. Forgiveness says, "I'm writing off the debt. I won't seek any kind of retribution for what you've done to me. I will never bring it up again." Everything inside says that the person should have to hurt as much as I do.
Romans 5:8 flies in the face of self-centered forgiveness. God lavished His love and grace on us through the sacrifice of His Son while we were still saturated in sin. If I'm to model that level of forgiveness, I will freely forgive even while:

• Someone continues to slander me
• There is no change of heart in the one who deeply damaged me
• Customers continue to take advantage of the business and walk away with large, unpaid bills
• Others make unfounded and entirely unfair assessments of me based on ludicrous conditions
• A person consistently disregards my needs

I admit, these are very small in light of the pain and suffering that many people around the world endure. Still, they bring pain, and the pain continues. I must forgive anyway.
The first person to actually articulate this perspective well was our son-in-law. It took me a bit by surprise. Somehow I had assumed that the offer of forgiveness was dependent on a desire for repentance. True forgiveness is very different.
A card sits on display in our room. Thomas Blackshear painted what has become a well known depiction of forgiveness. (Click here to view the picture.) Christ is supporting a man who is still holding a mallet and a spike. While we still hold His death in our selfish, rebellious grasp, Jesus forgives. How can I do any less?
Forgiveness is for the sake of the one who needs it, and for the sake of the Saviour Who engulfs me in His grace.